To post or not to post…

I thought this deserved some airing. As most of you know, I’ve been banned from several sims due to my opinions. Quite a few of you have been asking for a list of the sims I’ve been banned from so that you yourselves could not shop there. I’ve been a bit torn on the matter, because on one hand these are real people who, some of them make real life livings off of these things that they sell. On the other hand, they had no guilty conscience when airing much more personal and offensive things about me. They have outright tried to bully me out of having an opinion. In my honest opinion, if they are actually making a real life living off of these shops, why would they respond this way? Wouldn’t it be better if they took the heat and twisted it around to work for them?

So, that’s my two cents, there’s a lot more, but saved for a better time and a better place. I would not like this post to turn into a Pen bashing or any particular sim bashing, so be forewarned the moderating will be heavy. I’d love to hear your feedback, but keep it classy folks.

In the great wise words of Bertrand Russell “People are zealous for a cause when they are not quite positive that it is true.” (If you don’t know what that means, you probably should keep moving)

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143 thoughts on “To post or not to post…

  1. Whispers Magic

    My first response was “Hell Yeah” but then I pondered some more. By posting the names of the sims and thus starting a whole drama fest over it…somehow that almost takes you down to their level. As mature adults we should be able to express our ideas and thoughts without being persecuted for it. You weren’t given that luxury but I’d hate you to turn around and do the same thing to them. Rise above them and show them you are the better person….because you are. 😀

    • Pennelope Thiessam

      I agree whole heartedly… stooping is beyond me. But they did some pretty harsh and underhanded things, and it makes me wonder how many other blogs they have bullied around? It makes me sort of feel like I have to out of pure principal. If I knew multiple people were being censored in rl, I would be the first one in line to boy-cot.

      So, it’s a do I need to stand up for the opinionated little guy, or do I ignore them and keep them out of the spot light like I’ve been doing?

  2. Ampersand Artful

    it’s a difficult situation, no matter what pennelope eventually decides to do.

    on one hand, these people have bullied, belittled, and banned her (and her friends, I might add) to degrees much worse than the actual original offense.
    on the other, I’m afraid posting a public list of sims might stir up more trouble than it is worth.

    ultimately, it comes down to pen’s original intentions for this blog. to provide a service to whoever happened to stumble across this blog (turns out, a lot), and to possibly help shoppers be a bit more informed. choosing to post a list of sims who’s owners are keen to ban anyone who has an opinion differing their own would certainly help people be completely informed not only on the product, but the person they are doing business with.

  3. addisonmortlock

    Honestly, if everyone would read ALL of the comments made by both sides, Ampersand’s statement of “these people have bullied, belittled, and banned her (and her friends, I might add)” clearly goes both ways. (aside from banning, I assume.)

    I would ask you to consider all of the other store owners on the sims. I have spoken up on plurk every chance I get defending both your right to post what you want and her right to ban you from the sim she owns for whatever reason she chooses to do so.

    We are not going to move a very lucrative main store because of an issue between our sim owner (and good friend) and a blogger who has a right to speak her mind. However, we are one of many stores caught in the middle of this squabble. How is that fair to anyone?

    • Ampersand Artful

      to assume makes an ass of you and me.

      to the best of my ability, I have read every comment made on this blog, and a few others from different blogs. the onslaught of “bitch,” “douchnozzle,” and a handful of other words I don’t feel the need to repeat hurtled towards pennelope over a few eccentric remarks about pixilated goods is rather mortifying, and much, much worse than anything pen has ever blogged.

      does pen have a right to blog what she wants? yes.
      do sim owners have a right to ban pen simply because they do not approve of her blog? yes, but it’s arguably an abuse of their ban rights and quite reminiscent of “tommy can’t come into our clubhouse fort cuz he smells funny!”
      do people like myself have a right to not shop at sim or a store that feels the need be so arrogantly exclusive? hell yes.

      not moving your store is your prerogative, giving my business to people who can act like grown ups where it matters is mine.

      • Lavea Alter

        I’m glad to see that random insults by people not associated with A-BOMB somehow justifies rude comments about us. I’m all for constructive criticism, but that isn’t what is offered here about our shop. It’s been straight out snarkiness because someone couldn’t get to the shop due to a sim-wide ban.

        I’m sorry, but I do not for one minute believe that the writer of this blog thought that there would be no backlash from her comments. As a matter of fact, I am sure she was laughing as she played “stir the shitpot” just waiting for the reactions. Crying freedom of speech and censorship now is ridiculous. Even worse is trying to blackmail a designer into giving her free stuff so she will stop with the negative comments.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        “Even worse is trying to blackmail a designer into giving her free stuff so she will stop with the negative comments.”

        That would be a blatant lie, and just another example of their bullying and manipulation. Since I started this blog I have accepted a total of entirely two free things, neither were asked for.

        I actually never spoke with Ivey, so saying that I blackmailed her is asinine. When I spoke with Roblem, I offered to find some sort of middle ground, whether it be me still being banned but at least we are kosher or him actually lifting the ban and I could put a giant post about how wonderful the folks are at sn@tch. He refused both, and took the conversation I had with him, posted it publicly and twisted my words, saying that previously I tried to weasel free things out of him.

        Why would the only vendor I ever asked for free things be someone who hates me? That makes no sense at all. Wake up.

      • camrynfouroux

        I have heard this too, that you Penn told sellers to give you free items in return for positive reviews. It’s a pretty common comment on Plurk nowadays.

  4. POOP CHEESE

    “on one hand, these people have bullied, belittled, and banned her (and her friends, I might add) to degrees much worse than the actual original offense.”

    Like what?

    • Ampersand Artful

      I like you but you’re confusing me right now.

      I know my original post certainly wasn’t my most elegant, but could you perhaps elaborate as to what “like what?” means exactly?

      • POOP CHEESE

        Basically, do you care to expand on what exactly those people did when you say they have bullied, belittled, and banned her to degrees much worse than the actual offense?

        In otherwords…. LETS GET JUICY!

    • Ampersand Artful

      oh! I gettcha.
      gosh! I wasn’t sure what to make of your comment at first.

      well I already briefly mentioned a few in my reply to addison.

      but, umm… worst of them was when someone called constance “cuntstance”

      :X

  5. wacca wacca

    You’ve already been making notations about which stores have banned you so might as well post a list. You shouldn’t have used your actual SL name for this blog :-/

  6. Ev

    First let me say Love this blog! Your opinions are yours alone and you are very much allowed to air them in anyway you like 🙂 I am not such a mindless twit, that I cannot make a decision for myself on what I want to buy, I happen to love those Stellar jeans rofl
    Did you stop me from buying them? Hell no, but you did show me the picture of them and give me the slurl to go buy them (yes I had the nc but fighting lag and time restraints these days, I always come here first now)
    As a RL business owner, this emo crap makes me laugh. “oh you don’t like that item, fine then do not spend any money in my store again!” WTF is that all about? Sorry but if this is a RL project, please explain to me what kind of business refuses sales of any kind? Only people that do not depend on sales to make money, or people that simple have enough money to not have to worry about their reputation. Which by the way is almost laughable, having a rep for being an emo business owner in a virtual game, yes I said it boys and girls, a Game! Which could be gone tomorrow, so maybe these designers could grow up a little and realize it is not so much the product they are selling as it is the attitude of which they go about presenting the product. Keep the emo shit out of it, They are selling to make money not fans, somewhere along the way the product got lost and mindset was inflated. What are they teaching new & upcoming designers? Make your customers beg? Make your customers realize they are second citizens? And most importantly here, Make your customers understand they do not have a right to their own opinion!
    Sorry for the novel, post or not too post. Doesn’t really matter, word of mouth always has the last say 🙂

    • Whispers Magic

      omg I love you! I know I’m old and what not but I have worked retail a lot of years and you are soooo on the money! Well said! And I too come here because it saves me a ton of time tping when the tp’s rarely work!

  7. Dharaya

    I suppose it boils down to the question: do you want that kind of drama here on your blog and – maybe more importantly – inworld or not?
    No matter how deserved or appropriate it would be for you to post the names here, ultimately you have to decide if it’s worth opening the doors to people who may run you over with their reaction.
    Maybe nothing happens, maybe half your SL time is used up by extinguishing (or fueling?) fires for a while. It’s up to you to decide if that’s worth it or not. 🙂

  8. Skye D.

    I was one that asked her to post the list, but I can totally see how that could backfire and cause some serious drama.

    Maybe drop a notecard to the interested parties inworld instead? Still gets the word out, but doesn’t allow for a comment war…

  9. Ivey Deschanel

    Ok I give up…I felt it was my right as a land owner to allow or disallow anyone I chose to come on my land that I pay hundreds of dollars a month for. I thought as a sim owner that I would be able to keep people who so obviously can’t stand what I do from jeering and making fun of my work inside my own store or on my own land. I see that is not the case. I understand that it is perfectly fine to everyone here that Pennelope and her friends come to my store and the stores of any of my friends and snap pics of their ads and trash their products publicly for their amusement. Friends who also hate everything we make as so eloquently stated in several comments on this blog. I have never censored you or tried to. I think you have every right to make your comments, any comments you wish to fling our way and you do and have completely negating this censorship argument everyone lies to throw around. You haven’t been censored one bit. But I am going to unban you, you know why? Because I actually care about the designers on my sims. The more you post about being banned, the more they get trashed by your friends regardless of what they make. The fact that some spent a lot of time crying over the things you said aside, I’d like all of you who have been trashing us to think about who the bullies are in this case. I know you wont understand. You are standing up for your friend just like I tried to stand up for mine. As I’ve said before in other venues, I agree that Pennelope has the right to say whatever she likes however hurtful, as I think I have the right to ban someone who so blatantly and vocally can’t stand my work and uses her platform to make fun of it. I am lifting the ban on Pennelope today and this will be my last week in Humpday Happiness. Your words of criticism are not inspiring Pennelope, they hurt people. No one is challenged by your comments, they are discouraged. You got what you wanted though.

    • Pennelope Thiessam

      “But I am going to unban you, you know why? Because I actually care about the designers on my sims.”

      If you really cared, you wouldn’t have started this mess to begin with. You certainly wouldn’t have furthered the cause by letting your partner post private ims, publicly. You would have seen the publicity as something to work with and had the decency to talk with me and work something out. Instead you assumed I was some sort of unstoppable bitch. I offered to work with y’all and was refused. I don’t blame people here for seeing that and wanting to support me.

      I am not sure what I have said that might make someone cry. If this were real life, critiques would be made and much worse would be said. I apologize for any feelings that may have been run over in this entire debacle. It’s not my goal to make vendettas against any particular stores. My comments are off the wall and ridiculous, not meant to be taken seriously. The viewers can see that, why is it that only a particular handful of designers cannot?

      If you can’t see, making me out to be the bad guy is not working. People see straight through it, they are not idiots. I like to give folks more credit than that. Hold people to a higher standard. Maybe it will work, maybe it won’t.

      Hopefully in the end, people will see your willingness to unban me as a step in the right direction. You could keep me banned, your hand is not forced, people don’t entirely care what I have to say. They listen yes, but they form their own opinions, that you are just as capable of shaping as well. I’ll leave you with this, only two people on this blog were friends of mine before this blog started. The rest straggled by and formed their own opinion based on our actions. So when most of the negative comments are from friends of yours, and most of the positive ones are from people I have never met…. well, it’s just a thought.

      • Ivey Deschanel

        “So when most of the negative comments are from friends of yours, and most of the positive ones are from people I have never met”

        This is a lie and you are crazy.

      • Dharaya

        “This is a lie and you are crazy.”

        Criticising someone’s work is one thing, and everybody has the right to feel pissed about it. But this as a reaction? Way out of line.

      • dawnde Lane

        i have never met pen or anyone else from this blog in world, i have only made comments on this blog when i felt i had a comment to make.

        calling her a liar in its self is a lie

        crazy, maybe. we all a little gaga at times

    • Whispers Magic

      I have never met Pen but I have met and shopped at your store Ivey for years and years! I took what Pen said as humor. I didn’t listen to her opinion and make them mine. Some of your stuff I like and some I don’t. That is the case with most designers. I sincerely hope with this unban perhaps Pen would be able to shop there and get to know you and your store better because deep down I think you are a good person…at least I always held you and Rob in rather high esteem. As an outsider Pen is very well spoken and perhaps has a different sense of humor and is blunt but I don’t think she does it to hurt people merely to entertain. But that is just MY humble opinion.

  10. Sammie

    I found your blog because someone at another blogsite shot off her mouth about you…and i gotta say, i love your blog…:)
    I think you should just continue what you’ve been doing..if you’re banned, say so, and leave it at that…no pic, no comment.
    Those bishes are gonna stay on their high horses and think they’re all that….why add more drama to your life?
    They aren’t worth it.
    Just my opinion

  11. Heidi Halberstadt

    How is THIS not blackmail?

    >>him actually lifting the ban and I could put a giant post about how wonderful the folks are at sn@tch<<

      • Heidi Halberstadt

        That’s exactly what you do, half assed bullshit. You say about someone’s work “that is shit”, but you don’t say WHY, and that is not conducive for any reader to make an informed decision. Is it because seams are not matching? Is it bad texturing? Is it just the fact that it’s blue and you hate it? Or that it’s boring and you hate it?

        THAT is what all of this shit-storm is about. You tear someone’s work down so people can be spared to go to buy something, but you don’t say why something is bad. And that is what you obviously don’t get at all, that there is a difference between constructive criticism and making fun of someone’s hard work without any reason other than “I say it’s bad, so there”.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        Do you even read things before you post? you did the same thing on tinnisshoes blog, you have no idea what you are talking about.

        Quit reacting, read a few actual posts and form an opinion that hasn’t been fed to you. Please.

      • Heidi Halberstadt

        I absolutely read before I post, I’m not quite sure why you seem to think I don’t, and that I have others feed me their opinions. Because I don’t agree with you I’m not thinking for myself? Is that like you saying I’m trying to sound educated as a response to another of my comments?

        These are quotes from your posts, and prove the point my previous comment was making rather nicely:

        “5th & Oxford – Ordinary tube tops in blue and pink shiny colors. This place always has terrible 50L items.”

        – You don’t like the item put out

        “Hoot – I fucking hate this store, never again. Panties and eyes? Really?”

        – You don’t like the item put out

        “Shadenfreude [sic] is a fucking fraud. The SAME vest out again, but this time in yellow. Granted, I really like the vest, but put out something new already? The socks are cute, but my inventory doesn’t need another pair of striped socks.”

        – Oh look, yet again, you don’t care for the items someone put out

        I think these three samples are enough to show that quite possibly do know what I’m talking about. No. Constructive. Criticism.

        You are just another entitled mooch with an opinion she has to put out in an abrasive and insulting way to get at least negative attention. And shame on me for giving it to you.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        Unfortunately those were all posts from before I realized anyone beyond myself and a few close friends were reading this blog. I have since apologized and made an effort to be more exact with my criticism.

        Quit beating a dead horse. Keep up for crying out loud.

      • Jessica

        No doubt Heidi. I think you are trying to keep the drama alive. You’ve been in Plurk too long.

  12. Caileigh Magic

    This is the first time I have ever been on this blog. Reading your comments and you asking if you should post the stores that you are banned from. Ok this is my opinion and you don’t have to like it…however I don’t believe anyone should have a list of any store you were banned from. If there were reasons you were banned from the shop it happens and i don’t think handing out a list of shops that you got banned from is the right thing to do. The only thing it does is hurt the shop owners. It’s not hurting you. However making your friends not shop somewhere and making fun of people’s hard work is really uncalled for. If you don’t like the outfit you don’t like it. If I don’t like it I don’t buy it. I don’t go running off on a blog and telling everyone how ugly something is just to get kicks. The people that creative outfits, skins, buildings, furniture and anything else work hard to make this stuff and it takes a long time to learn. You don’t learn it in one day. But at the same time you do have the right to your opinion everyone does. But I really do think it would be the wrong thing to post every store that banned you….your not hurting anyone until you do that. Once you do that…you hurt someone doesn’t matter if you didn’t mean to…you did.

      • Caileigh Magic

        I will look over your blog Pennelope. See what you have to say. I have to say that I have found places that I have liked from bloggers like you. Saying that…I like Sn@tch. Ivey is a good designer. I’m not saying I like everything she does but like I said If I don’t like it…I don’t buy it. In a store in RL it is the same way. People like different things and that is what matters.

        Drama….drama is made by people that have an argument and bring it into the world by posting things that should have remained private but at the same time it goes further by someone (the other person involved) posting something back. I hate drama. Don’t need it. However I will comment on things that I know take a lot of hard work to do. Designers need opinions on what is good, bad, or horrible. However kicking them when they are down or pushing to the breaking point is stupid. Same go for bloggers. Your opinions do matter but hurtful ones just suck.

        Ok I said my peace. I hope this all works out in the end. Hate to see anyone get hurt.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        When I post things like self appointed sl quality control and giant amazons on my journeys… I really don’t expect people to take things so seriously. If someone got hurt it’s my bad, but if they had just come to me, I would have been more than willing to try and make things right. I mean I went as far as to tell Turquoise Unicorn Studios that I hate them, out of 50L frustration (OHHH we’ve all been there), and she sent me a message and completely changed my mind. She took my post as a challenge, and in doing so we both grew a smidge and now I can appreciate creepy furry eyes.

  13. Lavea Alter

    “My language is crude, my honesty is blunt, it is almost guaranteed you will be offended.”

    Y’all are actually blaming the designers for drama? Srsly? The drama here is all courtesy of the blogger.

    Revel in it, sweetie. Bask in the 15 minutes that is your fame.

  14. Cyclic Gearz

    I think that if you’re as hard-ass as you think you are, you should be able to take your own advice: “Wouldn’t it be better if they took the heat and twisted it around to work for them?”

    Whether you realise it or not – by making such a big deal about being banned, you’re coming off as very hurt, which coming from someone who has no qualms about insulting (yes insulting, you offer no constructive criticism, only your opinion and insults) people who put a lot of time and effort into their work.

    A sim owner has every right to ban whoever they like, they pay for the sim, and the land rights – it doesn’t even matter why they ban you either, they pay for the right to be able to do that. Be thankful you’e only getting banned and not AR’ed for abuse, which the people you are insulting could do, if they were really as nasty as you seem to think they are.

    I think there’d be less of a dramabomb around your blog if you were more constructive about things rather than outright nasty or blunt. As a naturally blunt person in both lives, I see no reason why everyone should put up with my bluntness, it’s not always as great as you’re making it out to be – it tends to alienate people. It isn’t compromising yourself if you take two seconds to think about others before you say anything that could hurt someone. I, personally have alienated a lot of people by being overly blunt, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t like the idea of ending up alone, a crazy old cat lady with no friends, because I managed to alienate people by being too blunt.

    I’d like to understand what bullying these owners have done, aside from name-calling, which if you’re considering that to be harsh bullying, I’d worry about whether you’d have the tenacity to continue your blog, especially as it seems you have a little harem of followers who echo your sentiments, which adds insult to injury for the hard working creators who you’ve just insulted. You really can’t expect people to just whistle and carry on as usual like that, they’ve been hurt.

    Perhaps if you offered constructive criticism on what you think could be changed about the item you’re dissatisfied with, you wouldn’t find yourself banned from so many places?

    • Pennelope Thiessam

      I never claimed to be a hard ass, quite nice and soft if you give me a chance.

      I haven’t made a big deal about being banned, quite a few folks have asked for the list, so I thought I’d put it up to viewers to get a final yes or no, because I was opposed to it. But, if enough people are really up for it, then I don’t mind.

      Quit posting stupid shit, how in the world are they going to AR me? For posting a public opinion? Come on. BUT, I am sure it’s an offense to post private im’s publicly.

      How am I possibly even capable of bullying? I am one person with an offensive opinion.. so what.

      Maybe you should actually read my blog before commenting.

      • Cyclic Gearz

        I never said you claimed to be a hard-ass, only that you seem to have an impression that you are one. The difference between being blunt and being nasty is a fine line, one that I’m not entirely sure you’re aware of.

        It’s not an offence to post IM’s outside of SL, that’s a popular fallacy.

        I’ll admit to having only browsed your blog a little. I am on a less than 512k connection, using GPRS, so I don’t have all day to sit here and wait for images to load. Yours is a tiny blog in a sea of many, I’m not waiting an hour for your site to load every. single. page.

        I haven’t accused you of bullying. I wanted to know what bullying the store owners have done to you, which they have been accused of by some of your commenters.

        I wasn’t even saying people *would* AR you either, I was saying they could have done, but didn’t.

        Your opinion is your own, don’t think you’re big enough to assume it’s everyone else’s.

        Thing is, my only issue is the attitude you have: It seems like you don’t care, but in fact, you do – or you wouldn’t be batting an eyelid at being banned. If you can’t handle being banned, or your readers can’t handle it, maybe folks need to re-evaluate the balance. You can’t mouth off and expect people to be happy about it.

  15. Roblem Hogarth

    Hi Pennelope, I’m Roblem.

    I did a little blog post of my own today. I would like for you to read it. http://roblemrants.blogspot.com/2010/05/ban-hammer-vs-blog-hammer.html

    So yes you win. I thought I had the right to lock the doors to people I don’t care for, I thought I had the right to protect myself and the people I love from people whose tactics I don’t care for. But you know what? I was wrong. You taught me and ever other sim and store owner out there a big lesson. The rights of one blogger is more important than the rights of sim and store owners combined. As the “Self Appointed SL Quality Control Coordinator” you and your friends rights to do whatever you like are far more important than simple sim and store owner rights, after all your blog is helping us all out. I’m so very sorry for the ban I was wrong. I have cleared out my ban list for all my sims. You, your friends, copiers, griefers are officially invited to do whatever you like to me, my partner, and everyone we hold near and dear. I was wrong to use censorship against you. Whatever else I can do to make things right with you and every other blog owner out there you let me know. After all you are more important than all of us. Without you we are nothing.

    Roblem Hogarth

      • Roblem Hogarth

        It’s all you Pennelope you have all the power here it’s not my fire, its yours. I don’t know what else I am supposed to be doing. I seriously cleared out my ban list of everyone, not just you and your friends but everyone. How is that contributing to the fire? Sim banns are just bad, so bad you were asking if people needed a list of bad banning sims. So I learned my lesson, you your friends and everyone has been unbanned. done and done. Tell me flat out, here on your blog, what else I need to do to make you happy.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        Roblem,

        I have no idea why you would do that. There are people on that list that probably actually shouldn’t be on your sim. So instead of acting mature, you have now opened up your vendors to griefers and what not in a public setting.

        No one said sim bans were bad, I have several folks banned from my place, but doing it because someone disagrees and has an opinion, that’s ridiculous.

        Like Constance said, you are trying to play the victim and people see through it. Not just me.

      • Roblem Hogarth

        Oh now Penn I’m a little confused. You told me flat out that no matter what peoples feelings are you are helping them. Bans are just a horrible atrocity, paramount and equal to censorship. After all Bans are so bad that “out of pure principal” you need to make a list of people that ban you. I’m totally blown away here is it just you that shouldn’t be banned for any reason at all, or are bans in general bad. Wow I just don’t know what to do now.

        Ok so was I wrong or right to unban you and your friends. I mean you are an empowered and strong woman, you say whatever you think. You have told me that positive or negative, no matter what you say it is helpful. OK cool I’m drinking the cool-aid here. I don’t get the backlash, did I do right or wrong in unbanning everyone including you? After all, every ban I did were for reasons I thought were important to me and my partner and friends at the time. I thought I learned that all bans were bad and violated human rights. Now you tell me that I have opened up my vendors to griefers. So what is the situation, are you the rule or the exception?

      • Ampersand Artful

        I wandered over from my pile of popcorn and juice boxes to ask when exactly pen said banning was bad?

        I believe the only context pennelope or anyone commenting on this blog said banning was bad, was in retaliation for something someone said on a blog. in fact, many people have stuck up for a sim owners right to ban, but the overwhelming amount of those people also agree that being banned is a serious offense, any maybe should have been more carefully thought out in regards to pennelope.

      • Roblem Hogarth

        Well shucks ladies, I guess I can’t win for trying here. I ask for clear answers and all I seem to get back here is something about words, juiceboxes, logic, and popcorn. After all wasn’t this blog post all about how quite a few people were asking the author where they shouldn’t shop because the author has been banned from places for unexplained reasons. This lead me to think if one ban is that important to that many people, and why wouldn’t it be. The hundreds of ban I had on my sim must be just as important to hundreds of times as many people. Now I read, Penn never said banning was always bad? So it is or isn’t, Oh maybe only banning Penn is always bad? I’m sure I’m wrong here too.

        Oh there was one other point to this blog post right… “Wouldn’t it be better if they took the heat and twisted it around to work for them?” This is you being helpful and incapable of ever hurting anyone ever, again, right, with your heat? Of course you do hurt people, you just don’t care if you do. Your actions really hurt my girls feeling and I can never forgive you for that. That alone should be enough of a reason to ban you. However I can’t ban you now because you have turned the very act of banning you into an issue that needs to have lists and boycotts. (implied of course) So my best move to “twist” the situation was to unban everyone including you and to let everyone sort the whole thing out for themselves.

        I’m done here. I’ll go forward and use my “ban-hammer” as I see fit as I am sure you will use your “blog-hammer” the same. Good luck with all your hits.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        I wonder if you use that logic in all that you do.

        Even though the vote was swaying towards yes, the comments here were leaning towards no, if you had left well enough alone you may have seen people rise up to the occasion and do the right thing. But, instead you have insisted on making yourself look like a fool.

        Have a little faith in people, they are not all mindless drones.

    • Cunstance Daehlie

      You’re contributing by trying to make yourself look like a victim.

      No one has been victimized.

      • Roblem Hogarth

        Oh cunstance I don’t know what you are talking about, I took major actions to write a wrong here. I took my ban list from 460 to zero, because banning people is wrong. I don’t feel like a victim and I’m sorry if I come across as one. If anything I see this as a fresh start, no more banning because banning people is wrong. It is a violation of individual rights and should never happen. I don’t know what you are on about with your first line, but I agree with you 100% with your second line, “No one has been victimized.” no one at all.

      • camrynfouroux

        Roblem, you need to quit talking before you make yourself look even worse. No one said banning was wrong and that you need to unban everyone from your list! People are saying that banning someone for having opinions about products is just immature and stupid. Banning a griefer or copybotter is perfectly ok and I am sure Penn and her friends would agree. It’s not the banning they disagree with, but the reason for the banning.

        For some reason, you are failing to understand that.

        And someone crying their eyes out over one blogger’s comment in a VIRTUAL world? Really? Really? For shame.

    • Whispers Magic

      I don’t believe there is ever, ever, ever, ever a reason you need to call ANYONE a cunt! Whether it’s a play on someone’s name or not! Whether you like them or not! It is tasteless and just plain RUDE! It shows no class!

  16. Elsa Weatherwax

    If you sell quality products then what the hell are you afraid of? If the product is good, even if Pennelope isn’t giving a good review, the customer will return. If they don’t like your product and your sales are shit, then stop making shit. By banning her from your sim you are admitting that she has power (hehehe) over your sales and also suggesting that your customers are sheep and have no opinion or free will of their own.

    The bottom line is that not everyone is going to like the things you sell……so what? Deal with it and learn from it. In RL or SL you will deal with criticism in design or anything you do. If you can’t take it and bounce back you’ve got a looooong way to go… IMO of course 🙂

    • Ivey Deschanel

      You people have no feelings at all, none. You’re miserable human beings with no empathy and no caring for anyone. The pain others feel is an excuse to jump on harder and attack even more cause You have no emotions and no understanding. There is no way you could know how the people you are attacking feel and you don’t care. I’ve never commented here and yet I have been called every name in the book because of a ban and YOU are the ones being censored and bullied?
      This isn’t criticism, this is a few people’s idea of fun trashing designers and things they don’t like. Aweee they cant take it, they should be tougher, they deserve it because they put their stuff out there in public. No one deserves this kind of attack. All I did was ban people I dont like an don’t want to come back. You can trash me all day and I can take it, but with your uncaring and thoughtless words you could make others who aren’t so strong give up altogether and that is just meanness. I make a great living in SL but the smaller stores and newer designers are not so set as I am and they will suffer for your negative and harsh approach. That you are proud of it and even say it is “helping and encouraging” them is very sad and completely misguided. And most people see that. The very few commenters on this blog are nothing compared to The hundreds of our friends and fellow designers and tens of thousands of customers who are the ones that really matter. So you can say all day that you have more support but you are delusional. The ban is off to try and help the other stores on my sims from being your victims simply by being on our land, but you and all of your friends even the ones too pussy to use their real names lol are unwelcome in my store. You don’t exist to me anymore.

      • Cunstance Daehlie

        >You people have no feelings at all, none. You’re miserable human beings with no empathy and no caring for anyone. The pain others feel is an excuse to jump on harder and attack even more cause You have no emotions and no understanding. <

        You're right about ME. You are WRONG about my friend, Pennelope. Her aim here is not to hurt people or make anyone cry.

        Are you an adult? Why is this so upsetting to you? I really cannot believe you have shed tears over this. It was something about that weird ass hair hunt, right? She basically said it was too laggy to deal with getting weird ass hair?? I don't know why that would cause you to become upset. You are a "long time and well-established" designer here in second life, correct? You have never heard of anyone disliking your pastel colored slutwear? I find this difficult to believe.

        I don't create anything for second life. If I did I would not cry over someone disliking it. But that could just be the soulless emotionless bitch in me, I don't know.

        Get over it, stop trying to play the victim here. It isn't working for you.

  17. Ampersand Artful

    as a major in fine art and digital art, critiques are a weekly part of my life. very quickly in the art game, I realized not everyone will like what I make. often, the reasons are based on personal taste and design choices I did or did not implement. someone not liking my work is not akin to bashing my skills as an artist.

    when I have to sit there and listen to people talk about my work, yea it stings a bit. raging into a four letter fueled rant and demanding the professor banish them forevermore from the class room would be quite an overreaction though. a much more proactive approach is start a dialog and take notes to help improve my future work.

    pennelope has made a noticeable effort to balance her opinionated smartassery with constructive reasons why she might not like a particular item due to criticisms made of her and her blog. yet she is still being accused of designer/product bashing. the problem people seem to have isn’t that she’s bashing anyone or anything. she isn’t. the problem is that a slew of sl designers and patrons just haven’t come to grips with being able to handle a bad review.

    • Elsa Weatherwax

      Cheers Ampersand! I’m in the same boat (graphic design major/illustration), with several critiques a week….I’ll be the first to admit it can be tough, but the key is that: IT IS NOT PERSONAL. It’s about your work and if you feel that critiques reflect onto your character then you need to develop a thicker skin. Critique is done to IMPROVE you ability as an artist/designer, not to drag you down. Take it for what it’s worth, or leave it if you don’t agree. Appreciate some one has actually taken the time to give criticism!

  18. Dove Swanson

    I’ve always been of the belief that if you have to ask whether you should or should not do something, you tend to already know the answer. Allowing anyone but yourself to come to that answer will only lead to regrets later, no matter how large the voice is in favor of something you’ve already stated that you oppose.

  19. Jeanie V.

    I believe that what you do on this blog is very much so needed in SL. I honestly think there is a difference in giving your opinion and critique on something a designer made, versus just bashing it just to be a hateful bitch. I of course don’t believe you’re a hateful bitch by any means. Your blog is completely dedicated to pointing out good deals and if the item is or isn’t worth the amount it’s being sold for. Giving your opinion is something people want to read.

    If a store owner feels they have to ban you, to spare them self the possible humiliation, that’s just ridiculous. I’ve seen you write some harsh shit, but nothing bad enough to be banned for. I don’t feel like you bash content creators either, i genuinely feel you promote them. It’s all in good fun. I hope you get unbanned to at least some of these places, and hopefully you won’t be banned in the future. Keep blogging and doing what you do though Pennelope. Don’t sugar coat something because you’re afraid to hurt someone’s feelings. Like I said before, there is a difference in speaking your opinion and bashing them, and I don’t think you bash anyone at all.

    Bashing is for people who use that plurk shit, just saying.

  20. Skye D.

    Bleah…after reading all this, I’m sorry I said anything, even if I wasn’t the only one.

    If the slighted designers want to blame anyone for this, they should blame SCD, who started this whole fiasco in the first place. That’s how I discovered this blog, liked it, and added it to my Favorites.

    Face it, no one is going to like everything you make. And I didn’t think Pennelope said anything in her earlier posts worse than the snark you find in a number of RL and SL “Fashion Police” blogs and articles. That anyone got such a huge bug up their butt about this is just a freakin’ crybaby.

    That said, I do respect the work that goes into making clothes, skins, etc. I’ve attempted doing it, failed miserably, and quickly left it to the people that know how.

    But to ban someone just because they post something that you don’t like, or perceive to be a slight against you personally…sheesh. Grow a thicker skin already.

    • Pennelope Thiessam

      No apologies, it was a sensible request.

      I definitely thought about the idea, a lot. And in the end I thought having everyone hash it out together might provide a much more positive solution in the end.

      Your comments and suggestions are always valid here. While some may whine and moan, others of us appreciate it.

  21. ann

    Pennelope, what power you have, that your opinion on your little blog apparently can bring entire simsful of shops to their collective knees. If you say a piece of merchandise is crap, apparently everyone in SL will immediately refuse to purchase it or even visit the store. If you say you are banned from a certain sim, nobody in SL will ever visit it again. Has it gone to your head yet?

  22. Rea

    Penelope,
    I love reading your blog. I think its really funny, and I can see the sense of humor in it.
    Designers in RL are faced with a lot of criticism. One person’s view of art may be another person’s trash. But if you love creating something, you should do it, and not second guess yourself if someone does not like it. When I started creating artwork in RL initially, I would get upset if something I created was judged harshly…but over the years I have learnt to laugh at critical comments, because i have grown and known who I am as an artist.
    As for SL designers who get upset when being criticized, I believe SL is a place where people all over the world contribute, and in some places people take harsh criticism more offensively than others. In the US, this could also be taken as a ‘roast’. 😀 (Some people take criticism more personally than others too)
    Keep doing what you do, maybe involve designers who have a sense of humor next time.

    • Pennelope Thiessam

      “But if you love creating something, you should do it, and not second guess yourself if someone does not like it.”

      EXACTLY!

      When you throw yourself into your work and put the effort you are capable of, criticism becomes less scary and more challenging.

  23. Tzagine Bellic

    All I have to say is WTF!!! What grade are we in here…
    If you have been banned deal with it… you are not payin the lindens or the US dollars … the sim owner does so like RL they have control over who comes and goes…it is sad that Ivey has to deal with this shit.. she is a truely awesome person.. and no i dont read your blog … I have more things worth while to do .. but like everyone else I have to put my 2 cents in a stick up for a friend

  24. Rea

    It is funny how those who criticize others do not take criticism well. Having heard a lot of designers criticize LL often, its funny how they cannot take criticism on their own. Just my two cents worth.

  25. dawnde Lane

    so having read the post for a few days i have come to some conclusions,
    1. This blog was never intended for the masses, it started of as a bit of fun for a few people who had a shared sense of humor. fine it’s content/wording was sometimes brash, but that is what Pennelope wanted her readers to read, and i for one found the comments not always true but funny and tongue in cheek.

    2.SCD decided this blog was offensive (i know what the hell is up with that pot calling kettle black and all that jazz)so this little fun blog got way more attention then was ever intended(I’m grateful to them for that thought :P) and it caused almighty ban-hammers, insults and tears.

    3.Some designers thought the comments were under handed and unfair and Ivy particularly found the comments very hurtful and was upset, and her partner was defending her, maybe using the wrong avenues to do so, but i see the chivalry in that and respect the man for doing so. unbanning 460 people(that’s a whole lot of peoples!) to try and cool down the situation.

    i personally, dont want a list if i look back through the blogs i can see the “banned” under pictures and think u should just keep that as a form of “letting people know”

    i like this blog, i do come here to see what is set out for that weeks FLF or Project, and i have to say i agree with most comments and some i dont, but i would never let that influence my choices in who i buy from cause for 1 bad piece there could be 5 good.

    maybe its time to just walk away now and move on, agree to disagree.

    GROUP HUG!

  26. Midi

    I’m trying so hard to not comment here, but darn, I’m going to.
    My thoughts:
    Pennelope asked for opinions about whether or not she ought to post a list. Some commentators had requested it. A sensible approach, encouraging some discussion about it, and the bulk of the feedback was that while we might all want to know who the designers in question were, it was better not to post it. Surely that’s what the designers in question wanted? Why wasn’t that the end of it? Bizarrely, it looks (from where I’m sitting) as though they really couldn’t stand the drama being over so had to step it up a gear.

    Dignified silence was the only appropriate response from the designers. Not “I shall unban everyone ever so that when I get crap from people who actually should be banned I can come right back here and blame you”.

    I like this blog, I’ve ready every post, I love the caustic humour and agree with some of the opinions and not with others. I’m disappointed that some designers feel I and everyone else who is a potential customer can’t make up our own minds.

    If you’re going to take part in a commercial venture, you really ought to be prepared for the fact that some people won’t agree that your stuff is worth paying for and some will think it’s the best thing they’ve ever seen. If you think we all ought to be grateful you allow us to give you our money and keep our mouths shut then I’m am just going to move on to somewhere else. I make stuff in RL that people test extensively before it goes on sale. Occasionally, I want to tell the testers to piss off and stop picking holes in it. I do not, however, because it makes for a better product in the long run.

    Oh, and for the record, I don’t know Pennelope at all, on the contrary, I have previously been a customer of Sn@tch and recommended it to others.

    • ann

      Midi, you mentioned what Roblem said he’d done (unbanning 460 people)….these small stores and new designers on their sims that Ivey is so worried about, they are going to be vulnerable now to potentially hundreds of known griefers just so Roblem and Ivey can make some kind of point? I can’t make any sense of that. It’s so bizarre that it unnerves me.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        That’s what I was trying to get at too. But instead I get a sarcastic response somehow likening banning griefers to banning me, and he’s utterly confused that they could be different.

      • Roblem Hogarth

        Hey “ann”, I never said I wouldn’t reban anyone that comes back to cause grief on my sims. I take very good care of my customers and renters thank you very much. Nice try.

      • Pennelope Thiessam

        You made a public statement on a currently popular blog that you are unbanning everyone, griefers included. Of course you put your customers and renters in harms way. I don’t see how you can possibly justify yourself here. It is only going to further your case in how completely over the top you are.

        As someone else stated, I understand why you would defend Ivey. It’s chivalrous, quite honorable and I respect you for that. But to fly off the handle and make decisions you can’t take back because you are angry, it’s irresponsible.

      • ann

        Roblem you aren’t making sense in kind of a scary way. Pennelope has just shown your quote as saying you won’t ban people from now on, and now you’re contradicting yourself. I can’t wrap my mind around the level of overreaction I’ve seen here to one girl writing a little snark on her own blog. I haven’t even been able to figure out just what exactly made Ivey cry. Pennelope only has the amount of power over you that you give her, and I see you giving her an enormous amount. Whose fault is that?

  27. Dagny

    99.9% of the stuff these so-called designers vomit up for sale is absolute shite, (especially that of the “designers” I’ve seen commenting/mentioning here). They deserve all the snark and badmouthing they receive. The people behind such atrocities as Sn@tch and the other whore-magnets should be ashamed of themselves. I’m tired of listening to them whine about the hours and weeks spent churning this crap out and how we need to respect them for it, give them little gold stars and not say hurtful things to make them cry. Look, we already know that if they had any talent whatsoever, they’d be using it in a real job, but if they spent even half the time they spend banning and crying over what bloggers have to say, making decent clothes, we wouldn’t have anything negative to say about them. Hey losers, I know you cant make it in the real world, but why don’t you at least go and get a job flipping burgers so you will realize that you can’t actually get away with a sub-par performance and still keep your job, let alone respect.

  28. Safeer Glendevon

    Children. . .it’s all fun and games till someone puts an eye out. Keep going like this and pretty soon we will all be blind. Close the threads, stop the drama and move on. if we can’t make peace over pixelated fasion, there is no hope for the world at large.

    Safeer Glendevon and Talender Serendipity

  29. cry me a river

    i here by dub thyself, self appointed drama llama.. everyone should bring their drama directly to me, do not pass go! i store the drama in a nice sealed container to use at later points in time.. failure to hand me your drama, will result in a ban from sl! that is all.. this message will self destruct in 5 minutes. good day!

  30. hannah

    Maybe consider an opt-out option for stores who can’t take the heat. Their loss, really. You’re doing a service by letting everyone know what items are available for purchase and if they can’t take the heat, they don’t deserve any potential sales.

  31. camrynfouroux

    OMG, I still cannot believe how out of control this whole thing has gotten. I am sure a lot of us have said…”omg I hate that store” over frustration, one stupid item, etc” It does not mean that someone actually HATES the store. It’s called a joke, sarcasm, etc.

    Like other’s have said, who cares if ONE blogger makes a negative comment about your stuff? When you create items and place them in a public forum, you are putting it out for comments, good AND bad. Take it like an adult and move on. If you love your items, and love what you do, and you still have customers who support you…then why are you so upset over one blogger’s comments? I just don’t get it.

    Do you think YSL stops making things and cries whenever a fashion critic slams one of their products? No! They have plenty of customers who LOVE them and they keep doing what they are doing.

    For some reason, SL has become cry-baby central. No one can criticize, no one can joke, no one can be rude, no one can GOD FORBID hate an item a seller puts out for sale. Do you really think your buyers are that stupid that if one person dislikes your item, that your customers will NEVER come back to your store? You really aren’t giving your followers any credit are you?

    Instead of just moving on, the attention that YOU gave to Penn has made her blog extremely popular. Congratulations! In fact, her negative comments have actually earned you more traffic and sales. I come here regularly now for the full run-down of weekly products.

  32. Addision

    Pennelope, do not change and do not apologise for being you. I love that you are so out there with your comments. After all it’s the very nature of you that got you a few additional followers.

    if peolple don’t like it, well that’s their problem.

    You be you……..please

  33. chilli

    So many words. I’ll put prompts.

    – “Bully” is or is at least becoming the new buzz word, isn’t it?

    – Anything in SL can and apparently also will lead to drama.

    – I’m “only” a shopper who pours her RL cash into SL without any inworld income or anything. I’ve become rather picky of where I’m spending my cash and prefer to think twice. Just like any land/estate owner is free to use the ban option, I as a customer should also have a choice to question myself with whom I want or do not want to start business. The problem is that I don’t have a handy ban list, but need to rely on word of mouth, reviews and blogs to make my own list.

    – As a compromise, keep on posting your “hints” in the blog posts. That plus the reactions by designers in comments provide a good basis to judge for yourself and build your own private “not shopping there” list.

    PS: I dislike the mildly hinted “if you aren’t a designer, you have no voice at all”. Well, if I was a designer on my own, I wouldn’t need any designer to shop from, just saying…

    PPS: If anyone would like my full SL name to ban me as well, let me know. Just using “chilli” because it kept coming up as auto suggestion. No naughty alt or anonymity play, I’m afraid, sorry.

  34. thebunnygirl

    I couldnt care less who was banned from where. I dont care if my best friend, my mom, my dog and my lotus clit attachment are banned from a sim.

    If it has something I want on it, nothing is going to stop me from getting it. Certainly not some drama between people not myself.

    Same principle behind me not giving a shit if an actor has a different political opinion than me and being happy to buy a ticket to their movie, or buying SL hair from someone I dont like or who doesnt like me.

  35. Astrid

    Holy crap. I’ve been thinking this over since yesterday.

    I come to this site now daily. I don’t log into SL on a daily basis, and I know Pennelope posts Humpday stuff and FLF stuff, and I’d rather look it over here than spend my time teleporting around looking at things I probably won’t buy. I spend my RL money on Lindens to have the privledge to buy stuff in SL, so yeah, I want a preview of it. I always read her comments, and I don’t always agree with them. However, after reading the feeds for like 2 years now, I’m glad to see that someone has the balls to actually give a real opinion on something rather than “it’s cute” or “it comes in 5 colors.” I don’t give a crap how many colors it comes in. If there’s something wrong with it, I want to know. The so called reviews done on SL blogs AREN’T. There, I said it. Ok, some are, but most are just sunshine and puppies.

    As for all the other drama going on, esp. the Roblem stuff…wow, throw the baby out with the bath water why don’t you? Seriously, doing that has made you look worse. So what, you banned her. You had that right, and I don’t think she ever disputed that. She tried to work something out PRIVATELY, and you brought it public. Yay. But then to come back over and over and try to act like the biggest gentleman ever, and that you deserved some sort of medal because you cleared your ban list? Build a bridge and get over it. Crist. That was the biggest bunch of crap ever. Oh, and I’m willing to offer up my name if you want to drop the ban hammer on me. Because look…ooooh…I can has opinion! I’m a grown up, and I can form my own. I don’t subscribe to some hive mentality that I see in SL. However, the people here haven’t been subscribing to it for the most part…they too can has opinion.

    Anyway, I plan to keep coming to this blog to see what’s being offered. As long as she posts it that is. So what if SCD doesn’t like this blog? So what if some special snowflake can’t handle the fact that someone might not like what they offer? Clearly, there are those of us who DO like it. Not that I care one way or the other where you’re banned, Pennelope. Just keep doin’ what you’re doin’. 🙂

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